'Have you ever been concentrated more on the music in background than on what was really happening during sex?'
The only question of yesterdays night. And the answer was 'many times'
Saying 'oh God, I am really into this.... music' is not a sin right? However, what do we all expect from sex?
1)It must be spontaneous, or at least it must seem that it started coincidentally.
2)Nothing wrong must be said.
Unfortunetaly there are plenty of words or phrases that stop everything and only a few which really turn you on. On the other hand, you get nothing without risking. Play it for your advantage - everything might be taken with humor or even with humor with an sexual allusion. Also confident gestures help.
3)Right time, right place, right dress.
You women will know what I mean with the right dress. And there is only one solution. If you want your sexual life to be spontaneous, you must be prepared anytime then. Wear only the kind of dress and underwear in which you feel sexy and confident. Of course, you must feel comfortable as well.
The problem with the place - it is not only your messy room or plenty of stuff laying everywhere, but also music in the background is very often required by at least one person. Sometimes, replacing this music with your own 'voices or noices' is better, nice change. Enjoy listening to each other, to your bodies.
An as to the messy room - definitely don't start to freak out when you realize that you haven't tidied up for ages and definitly do NOT start tidying in front of your crush. (There are some exceptions, but I hope that nobody takes anybody in their place when it is more like a house for pigs than for two people. Keep your place clean. If you want your sex to be about purity and cleanliness, than you should also keep your apartment clean)
The rest is up to what it is going to happen. Let it go fluently and do not think. There is never good sex if your brain is on. It is definitely you who must be on.
(I'm) done with love
Written in the one o'clock after midnight early light, or late night when I realized that my body has recently gone trough a lot. I met my ex again, which had seemed to be okay earlier, but this time I felt sick about him. I am wuite unsure what has changed, because I met him a lot of times looking eyes to eyes while this time having noticed him from 10 meter distance I immediately felt sick.
Is my body resistant to love or just irresistant to sadness? Finally it took me three days to get out of bed for buying more coke to get back on my legs. Now I am even able to walk, not only to stand but still there are some factors pushing me down. In the early one o'clock after midnight light or a late night I realized that my ex has moved. Seeing somebody else he seems confident and proud. Looking good. Damn he still looks good. Unfortunatelly I do not. Despite having thrown up more times than it is acceptable for official sadness, I am gaining weight and still the only thing which keeps me alive are cigaretts. Isn't it killing me?
In this very late hour I couldn't have helped but wondered - are people who never expirience true physical sadness going to be happy forever and ever? And what about those people who have fucked it up years ago, are they supposed to be fucked up forever either?
Fuck it then, I am not gonna be one of those persons, I am going to have a life.
Is my body resistant to love or just irresistant to sadness? Finally it took me three days to get out of bed for buying more coke to get back on my legs. Now I am even able to walk, not only to stand but still there are some factors pushing me down. In the early one o'clock after midnight light or a late night I realized that my ex has moved. Seeing somebody else he seems confident and proud. Looking good. Damn he still looks good. Unfortunatelly I do not. Despite having thrown up more times than it is acceptable for official sadness, I am gaining weight and still the only thing which keeps me alive are cigaretts. Isn't it killing me?
In this very late hour I couldn't have helped but wondered - are people who never expirience true physical sadness going to be happy forever and ever? And what about those people who have fucked it up years ago, are they supposed to be fucked up forever either?
Fuck it then, I am not gonna be one of those persons, I am going to have a life.
Reincarnation
So here comes the moment, when it is right to believe in reincarnation. I've realized, he is not going to love me again. Not me. So I would die just to be born as another person.
Sick
I don't know it is from all that sex or not having sex, but everything just make me sick now. I want to throw up from everything it is all about.
Do we really need to reach any real values? Does anything like a real value still exist even in todays world? And if yes, what is it? Love, friendship, career, relationship or any of those -ships?
Do we really need to reach any real values? Does anything like a real value still exist even in todays world? And if yes, what is it? Love, friendship, career, relationship or any of those -ships?
Sex with an ex
It has been already three months since I last slept with him. We broke up in November and at the New Year's Eve it happened for the first time. So - here is the list of the advanages which I recognized while it was still ok to sleep with him:
1) The sex itself was much better than when we were together
2) Everytime we did not know whether there was going to be any kind of resumption, so everytime it was like it was the last time and everytime it was the best
3) It is comfortable to sleep with somebody on whom you know what works and so does he, it is really a big benefit
4) You put away all that love, stress and future stuff away and just enjoy the physical part of what is happening (which, later experience shows is also a big disadvantage at the same time)
5) In case it was him who ended the relationship having sex with an ex is giving you hope that he still cares about you and he will find out, what he was missing without you. This hope fulfills you with feeling of being good at both - in bed and also being a good partner. However, lately you just recognize it is not like that. He will not return to you and all that it is about is just having sex. Here we go with the disadvantages which may appear lately than the advantages, but be sure, they will come.
1) It is exhausting. It really is from both perspectives - physically, you must have all the things prepared in any time, when you still feel wanting him back. I even used to buy his favourite stuff for breakfast and keep it at my place and then just threw it away. And mentally it is exhausting because your brain is constantly working. You cannot stop thinking about last night or when will be the next time or whether there is going to be any newt time.
2) You never know, whether he is sleeping with other women. Asking him will mean that you are making problems and you are not going to see him again. Not asking him may be a problem in connection with all those illnesses, deseases and whatever you really do not want to hear about.
3) It will not end good. Face it. There is no even a little possibility of this having a happy end.
4) Facing it is stronger than you, so then when it comes and you are never seeing each other any more, when the final ending is here it breaks you. Do you think that you were completely broke when he ended the relationship? No, honey. This is the one and only end that will hurt you in all the little nice places left in your heart and it will change you a lot.
5) Since this ended, he's been behaving ok, feeling no trouble while you are still completely down. And when I say completely, I mean it.
6) All the advantages mentioned above are lately disadvantages. If you are having such a great sex together, why the fuck didn't you do it while you were still together - that is after 'will there a any next time' the second question asked in your head when you've finished. Is love an obstackle in having the best sex ever?
7) Damn, there are too many disadvantages, I don't wanna face it. It is my time to understand I still care about him and he still can have me any time he would like to. I am not showing this fact, but deep inside of me I still know he can have me and I want him to.
1) The sex itself was much better than when we were together
2) Everytime we did not know whether there was going to be any kind of resumption, so everytime it was like it was the last time and everytime it was the best
3) It is comfortable to sleep with somebody on whom you know what works and so does he, it is really a big benefit
4) You put away all that love, stress and future stuff away and just enjoy the physical part of what is happening (which, later experience shows is also a big disadvantage at the same time)
5) In case it was him who ended the relationship having sex with an ex is giving you hope that he still cares about you and he will find out, what he was missing without you. This hope fulfills you with feeling of being good at both - in bed and also being a good partner. However, lately you just recognize it is not like that. He will not return to you and all that it is about is just having sex. Here we go with the disadvantages which may appear lately than the advantages, but be sure, they will come.
1) It is exhausting. It really is from both perspectives - physically, you must have all the things prepared in any time, when you still feel wanting him back. I even used to buy his favourite stuff for breakfast and keep it at my place and then just threw it away. And mentally it is exhausting because your brain is constantly working. You cannot stop thinking about last night or when will be the next time or whether there is going to be any newt time.
2) You never know, whether he is sleeping with other women. Asking him will mean that you are making problems and you are not going to see him again. Not asking him may be a problem in connection with all those illnesses, deseases and whatever you really do not want to hear about.
3) It will not end good. Face it. There is no even a little possibility of this having a happy end.
4) Facing it is stronger than you, so then when it comes and you are never seeing each other any more, when the final ending is here it breaks you. Do you think that you were completely broke when he ended the relationship? No, honey. This is the one and only end that will hurt you in all the little nice places left in your heart and it will change you a lot.
5) Since this ended, he's been behaving ok, feeling no trouble while you are still completely down. And when I say completely, I mean it.
6) All the advantages mentioned above are lately disadvantages. If you are having such a great sex together, why the fuck didn't you do it while you were still together - that is after 'will there a any next time' the second question asked in your head when you've finished. Is love an obstackle in having the best sex ever?
7) Damn, there are too many disadvantages, I don't wanna face it. It is my time to understand I still care about him and he still can have me any time he would like to. I am not showing this fact, but deep inside of me I still know he can have me and I want him to.
Are we all just fucking hypocrites?
Unce upon a time there was a girl. She was nice, pretty and honest. After some time, she was just honest. And after some longer time she become extremely sexy and still she was honest. Was that her advantage to be honest? For some men, it evocated just provocation and for the other men it just caused errection. The real question is - what happened to her during the past ages? Well, at first there was this sociopath to whom she was even engaged and then she fortunatelly broke up with him. Second, there was this guy - perfect with accurately sized penis and great sense of humor. She not only broke her heart, but she was pushed to choose between her family and him and when she decided for him to be the one to be with, he left her. So - what else remained to her than the real nothing.
You can't hide from the truth, because the truth is all there is.
And since then, she was still still honest. Is that a sin to be honest? People, experience shows, do not want to face the truth. I am not perfect, neither was the girl. However, facing this fact brings a fucking relief. I am not perfect, neither is the girl, so what. Is there anyone left who will accept this hypocritical commision?
You can't hide from the truth, because the truth is all there is.
And since then, she was still still honest. Is that a sin to be honest? People, experience shows, do not want to face the truth. I am not perfect, neither was the girl. However, facing this fact brings a fucking relief. I am not perfect, neither is the girl, so what. Is there anyone left who will accept this hypocritical commision?
Stop playing
To be single is not a sin - THE discovery of todays morning. I am not going to play with men for this time. I am going to lef them all as they are and finally - focus on my carreer more. I am studying law now. I've just borrowed many books from the local library and I am reading them all. So, what this decision was or is all about? Well, I do not think that the results of the possibility of having each man I want are so enriching for me. I mean, for them, for all of them it definitelly must have been a big big experience, but for me it was not. I mean I do not regret my past behaviour, but it is enough for now. All these men had quite an imagination of me being married with them, spending my whole life with just one man and to tell the truth - this is really what I would love to have one day. However, I will never be able to reach this goal by playing games and nobody ever will. Stop playing, guys. That is what I advise at least for now.
Being a femme fatale
When I was about 13 I promised to myself that once I will become a femme fatale. That I am way too good and that I definitelly can have ANY man that I want. After a couple a years later, I have found out that actually I really became what I had planned. My question is - is that really an advantage?
I mean, I can be visually, mentally and also physically perfect whenever I want to, but is that really what I need? I was wondering, if men are not going to be scared of my perfection, but apparently I have also a talent for playing so it come true and I did just realize I am able to have any of men from my current surrinding. (Except of one - my ex, but that is acceptible or at least understandable, I hope.)
At first, don't take me as a selfish person please. I just know my pluses and minuses as well.
And second - being a femme fatale did not appear to be an advantage in the end.
I realized, the sooner the man falls for me, the more time I need to fall for him and the sooner I feel an urgent need to quit. Even without having a sex. And I know I might have had a lot of great sex experience there. However I just did not need it, or at least did not want it.
So, what now? What is left? What are my current goals, when I finally hit my peak, let's say?
Of course, for me it is natural and always used to be natural to want the only thing in the world that I just could not have at the moment, so I would expect me wanting my exboyfriend back.
The truth is, I do want him back, but knowing this fact and fully accepting is just makes me more placid about the whole thing. Maybe it is also due to fact, that I am recently facing another problem.
I was recommended by my best friend to try dating an older guy or a foreigner. So thanks to my femme-fatale characteristic I've got it both in one and I am recently dating an older foreign man. I've expected him to be really experienced, or at least more experienced than me, because to tell the truth, I did not have many sexual partners and still, I know what is good or bad. I have no doubt, that I have not experienced the best, or at least that is what I hope for. However, this older-foreign man has one more specific feature about him. He is not only older, well behaving and foreign, but he is also a bad kisser. Those are the worst, it is said. And I truly understand - how can anybody can be good in bed when he or she is even not good in kissing? Or is it only my thing to care that much about kissing? So, now I am facing a difficult question, because, to be a little bit selfish for myself, it still has got some advantages - I feel comfortable with him like I haven't from my last broke up nearly a half a year ago, he really makes me laugh and for whats more - I at least practise my language skills. Nevertheless, he unfortunatelly does not practise his (mother) tongue as well.
So, let's see what it will be like after the next date, or if there is going to be any, because he fell for me so quickly, that I am starting to feel those urgent needs for quitting. Let's see, I say.
I mean, I can be visually, mentally and also physically perfect whenever I want to, but is that really what I need? I was wondering, if men are not going to be scared of my perfection, but apparently I have also a talent for playing so it come true and I did just realize I am able to have any of men from my current surrinding. (Except of one - my ex, but that is acceptible or at least understandable, I hope.)
At first, don't take me as a selfish person please. I just know my pluses and minuses as well.
And second - being a femme fatale did not appear to be an advantage in the end.
I realized, the sooner the man falls for me, the more time I need to fall for him and the sooner I feel an urgent need to quit. Even without having a sex. And I know I might have had a lot of great sex experience there. However I just did not need it, or at least did not want it.
So, what now? What is left? What are my current goals, when I finally hit my peak, let's say?
Of course, for me it is natural and always used to be natural to want the only thing in the world that I just could not have at the moment, so I would expect me wanting my exboyfriend back.
The truth is, I do want him back, but knowing this fact and fully accepting is just makes me more placid about the whole thing. Maybe it is also due to fact, that I am recently facing another problem.
I was recommended by my best friend to try dating an older guy or a foreigner. So thanks to my femme-fatale characteristic I've got it both in one and I am recently dating an older foreign man. I've expected him to be really experienced, or at least more experienced than me, because to tell the truth, I did not have many sexual partners and still, I know what is good or bad. I have no doubt, that I have not experienced the best, or at least that is what I hope for. However, this older-foreign man has one more specific feature about him. He is not only older, well behaving and foreign, but he is also a bad kisser. Those are the worst, it is said. And I truly understand - how can anybody can be good in bed when he or she is even not good in kissing? Or is it only my thing to care that much about kissing? So, now I am facing a difficult question, because, to be a little bit selfish for myself, it still has got some advantages - I feel comfortable with him like I haven't from my last broke up nearly a half a year ago, he really makes me laugh and for whats more - I at least practise my language skills. Nevertheless, he unfortunatelly does not practise his (mother) tongue as well.
So, let's see what it will be like after the next date, or if there is going to be any, because he fell for me so quickly, that I am starting to feel those urgent needs for quitting. Let's see, I say.
A threesome
Ok, so yesterday I was asked to have a threesome and my question is - what is it with us people? Right now I am having a hangover and due to the inappropriate amount of yesterdays vodkas with soda my body is behaving differently at the moment. It has special demands different from the usual ones. My appetite for example is way too far from my standard. I've just actually realized, I want to have sweet pasta with cinnamon and honey, little bit of lemon juice and sugar. Weird, I haven't eaten this meal since I was a little kid and for whats more, I used to hate it back then. However, now I really feel like preparing it just for my special taste. All this pasta-thing led me to an idea - isn't it just similar to people and relationships? To be precise people and ended relationships.
If a relationship is an enjoyable party, then after an end you have a hangover and your body is not working as usual - it has got its own special demands. Like me and the sweet pasta. So, the real question is - do I really want to do a threesome?
I was thinking about it the rest of the night since I was asked and actually danced either with two women at one time and with two men at one time as well just to have a brighter image of the whole thing. The truth is, I am not sure which dance I liked more and even if I liked it at all. Did I? Did I not?
Now, having an uncontrollable desire for a pasta with cinnamon and honey I am asking - will this really satisfy me? Is that what I really want in general? Or is it just a post-alkoholic status that my body is having right now dazing and confuzing my general feelings, needs and tastes?
If a relationship is an enjoyable party, then after an end you have a hangover and your body is not working as usual - it has got its own special demands. Like me and the sweet pasta. So, the real question is - do I really want to do a threesome?
I was thinking about it the rest of the night since I was asked and actually danced either with two women at one time and with two men at one time as well just to have a brighter image of the whole thing. The truth is, I am not sure which dance I liked more and even if I liked it at all. Did I? Did I not?
Now, having an uncontrollable desire for a pasta with cinnamon and honey I am asking - will this really satisfy me? Is that what I really want in general? Or is it just a post-alkoholic status that my body is having right now dazing and confuzing my general feelings, needs and tastes?
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